Hiking In Grace & Capturing My View

An Old Familiar Melody

01.25.13

(Before reading through this post; I ask you to please pause the music at the top of this page just under the menu bar.)

Though it was only rehersal,

It was a sacred time;

The Lord came near.

One of those times when you can almost feel Him;

We just knew He was there.

The quiet man with the guitar in his hands,

played an old familiar melody;

But not one I had ever heard in a church.

As the words came to mind, I sang them out.

And Memory? She began to wake up.

I was asked to grab a hymnal and read Psalm 40 aloud.

I uttered words into a microphone,

And Memory caused the voice to tremble and the eyes to fill.

And all of a sudden,

Something that took place a long time ago;

Finally made sense.

Twenty-five years ago, my junior year;

Standing in the dark of night in front of my high school;

Watching red and white lights flash their rhythmic warning;

Fire trucks and ambulances littering the road.

Bits and pieces of my best friend’s car scattered on pavement.

My hands shaking… uncontrollably…

Actually… all of me was shaking.

She’d been studying at the public library next to the school.

She was on her way home.

She was on her way Home.

The room was over-flowing with teenagers dressed in black;

Whose hearts were aching and eyes pleaded silently heaven-ward, “Why?”

The man in the pulpit quoted the chorus of a song by a popular top 40 secular rock band.

“How long to sing this song?”, he asked.

I don’t remember a whole lot that happened in the days just before and in the days following;

Everything was all pretty much a blur.

But that quote? That I remember in crisp focus.

When I came to Christ in my twenties, I did so in a church where the leadership abhorred anything “up beat and secular”. So automatically, knowing nothing different, I obediently put that straight-jacket on and conformed my opinions to stay tightly drawn.

When I did so, I looked back at that funeral message based on a song by U2 as offensive. I puffed up with what I was told was “righteous indignation” and I wondered, “Why on earth would he do that?”

But last night?

I finally ‘got’ it.

Though way back when, I owned the album,

I guess I never really listened to the words of the song nor did I seek to understand them.

But now?

It is clear as the blue sky…

Bono was sharing the gospel through his music;

He never labelled his group a “christian” band.

I was too blind to see it back then

but by Grace I now can see.

The song “40” is based on (almost verbatim) Psalm 40 of God’s own Holy Writ.

Someone shared with me that Michael W. Smith did a version of it too. I went looking for the Michael W. Smith song on youtube this morning, and I stumbled upon a video recorded at a U2 concert. It was titled “Yahweh & 40”. I took a moment and sat and watched and listened

…and worshipped the Lord along with Bono.

Please do take a few minutes and truly listen.

Don’t let preconceived ideas stop you.

Step out of any box you may be in

if only for a moment,

and hear every word sung…

as an offering to God.

That old familiar melody? …has new meaning in my life.

Walking in new Light today.

Linking up with Emily today. Click on over and read the other Imperfect Prose on “Light”.

Ministering to Her Mother -Imperfect Prose

01.24.13

She sees her mother struggle to rest… in grace… and she hands me earbuds and tells me to listen, that I need to hear this song she found.

I listen and request repeat.

My eyes fill up and the peanut butter smearing onto bread goes a bit fuzzy.

She tells me it is a new day and that I need to remember to see it that way;

A fresh start.

Turn the page…

on yesterday…

… last week,

last month,

last year…

on all of it.

I marvel at how God’s wisdom spills from her fourteen year old mouth;

And wrecks a good kind of havoc on the shadow that has hovered lately.

So quickly it dispels the darkness that has wrapped itself around my head.

Her smile is infectious and her eyes dance along to the melody echoing in her heart: praises to her Jesus.

The wheels go round and the next song plays and He reminds me of how I prayed that He would grow her into a beautiful soul, despite my lack of skill in mothering and nurturing.

And I see Him working in her heart and spirit.

I am filled with thankfulness that she thinks clearly and stands firmly in her confidence in her Jesus;

the one who says she ‘is to die for’.

Oh, yes, she is and oh, yes, He did.

(To watch the video, pause the music player at the top of this page just under the menu bar.)

If you can’t see the video, click on over here.

Linking up with Emily today. Click on over and read the other Imperfect Prose on “Mother”.

Gratitude: Catching Up From the Holidays

01.14.13

Christmastree

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1446. the nurse agreed to swab all four throats

1447. they all had strep at the same time

1448. God’s mercy in not stringing sickness in our family out over several weeks (by them all getting it at the same time)

1449. all of them on medicine at the same time

1450. friends who prayed us through it

1451. tap dancing wise men, and he thoroughly enjoyed himself doing it

1452. “he channels Riverdance really well” made me laugh right out

1453. she enjoys listening to the twins in the car, “the twins” Peace and Quiet

1454. the friend who referenced “the twins”, such a sweet spirit, thankful to have her as a friend

1455. wise advice from a sincere friend

1456. more wise advice from the same friend, bringing focus to certain relationships

1457. Bev, Bon, Mar, & Ang and their friendships

1458. her so small singing out so loud and strong

1459. on pitch, perfect timing, & clear diction

1460. with confidence

1461. sons who dress up, on their own, to honor their little sister

1462. hearing the three of them compliment her on her performance

1463. bald eagle perched in a tree

1464. artichokes

1465. his owl hanging on the fridge

1466. her canvas completed

1467. soft light from above instead of the harsh blue florescence

1468. Expensive dress pants found cheap at Goodwill

1469. apple butter, still savoring Rachel’s deliciousness in a jar

1470. sun-dried tomatos

1471. her reading me a recipe over the phone

1472. leaf-barren black fingers reaching up out of the fog in the valley

1473. Christmas lights and greenery on our front steps (the first time ever, in 19 years of marriage, to have decor outside)

1474. David Nevue’s Christmas music quietly filling the room while we have family devotions Christmas morning

1475. feeling the floor vibrate beneath our feet while the pipe organ blasts loud its bass notes

1476. finding the perfect cup for my “Diva” friend

1477. her giggling, finding a shirt that says ‘got drama?’

1478. a white Christmas- a good dusting of snow appearing Christmas Eve

1479. well-behaved kids

1480. a quiet Christmas at home

1481. candy-canes peeking out of fluffy stockings

1482. bows perched on Mango’s silky-soft head

1483. Carmel freshly bathed, breathing in the scent of Peach Mango in her fur while snuggling with her

1484. magnificently huge flocks of blackbirds making shorn cornfields black as coal

1485. white falling softly and silently

1486. our snowdog Mango and her new brave sidekick Carmel

1487. french toast and ham and maple syrup

1488. towering trees covered with Christmas lights

1489. Longwood Gardens at Christmas time

1490. White pointsettias

1491. pine trees bowing low under heavy white snow

1492. skeleton limbs of trees plastered with snow

1493. old barn dressed in snow

1494. Elvis singing “I’ll be home for Christmas”

1495. the rainbow on my wrist

1496. my four daughters (2 have 4 legs)

1497. Carmel, the tropical dog, seems to finally have adapted to snow

1498. the kids playing at the creek in the snow

1499. snowmen in the backyard

1500. she made her first snowman

1501. fluffy pink bathrobe making her cozy and warm

1502. him sledding with the kids

1503. the new plug making it possible to have “play” baths again

1504. watching Road to Avonlea with my oldest

1505. What’s in the Bible? keeping them entertained and learning at the same time

1506. the talented Phil Vischer- so many voices from one mouth

1507. pizza and movies with the kids

1508. Phil Vischer’s outtakes making them laugh hysterically

1509. birds in the clearing under the pine trees

1510. finding a bench next to the stream by the clearing

1511. enjoying the quiet of the snow

1512. the oldest son commenting that the bench would be a great place to sit and read the Bible

1513. good friends to share an evening with

1514. Cookie- the Shee-poo, so tiny and soft

1515. he helps to clean up my mess with me

1516. laundry washed and folded – and not by me 🙂

1517. that evening when she cleared the table, washed the dishes, and cleaned the kitchen without me uttering a word

1518. rapid strep tests

1519. finaly recieved “Desperate” by Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson

1520. she always knows when I am about to need a tissue

1521. Littlest really missed her teacher over the winter break

1522. a small table near the window, a place to set my coffee while I read/study

1523. a new favorite spot to sit and read

1524. rainbow on the floor and the wall

1525. Scripture typer- The Romans Project

1526. flylady.com

1527. clarity concerning certain relationships

1528. his wisdom confirming my thoughts

1529. slant guides

1530. a surprise visit from a good friend

1531. finally get a post up after a long break

Hiking forward,

Sharon

(linking up with Ann today)

As A Desperate Mom…

01.12.13

I recently read Desperate by Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson. A book I wish I had been given 14 years ago.

Sarah Mae writes honestly from her heart. Telling us like it is. Telling it the way we, as tired, weary, (dare I say, often lonely?) moms of young children, feel deep down inside but are afraid to say out loud.

Page after page, I found myself underlining full paragraphs and writing “YES!!” in the margins. My head nodded as I read descriptions of disappointments where her expectations of what motherhood would be like were shattered by real life.

It is so nice to know I’m not the only one that has been there.

Thankfully, Sally comes along and shares wisdom learned from rearing her own four children. She tells of having some of the same experiences and follows it up with how she approached each one and what she has gleaned from them.

Sally gives many suggestions and ideas to overcome and gain victory, offering practical ways of countering many issues though careful to not give a formula or an absolute “this is the way it is done”.

Over and over she reminds us that every family is different and God created each family with its own culture and personality. We were all made with so many wonderfully different attributes and I am thankful for the reminders that we are. all. different. Consequently, there is no single answer to the issues we face as moms.

Sarah Mae shares about her struggles to follow formulas regarding disobedience and discipline, which so often result in false guilt. I found it identical to my own experience.

“I was told that if I would just do X, Y, and Z, she would obey. If she wasn’t obeying, it was my fault; I was doing it wrong. Of course I felt like a terrible mother.”

Oh, yes. I’ve been there myself.

“Formulas don’t create guilt, but failing to get the desired result from following formulas most certainly can lead to horrible feelings of inadequacy and guilt…”

So very true.

She followed much of the bad advice I had been given as a new mom with the same result I got. She writes of the effect it had on her son, “It was not heart corrective; it was heart damaging.”

Much of these issues which lead to deep disappointment leads many moms into the darkness of depression. I am so thankful that she was open about her experience with that battle. Having been there myself, it was refreshing to read that I was not alone in my experience.

Sally gives wonderful advice to anyone with a dear one going through the valley of depression;

“be careful not to condemn your friend, and in doing so drive her away.”

“Christians should not shoot the wounded with pharisaical attitudes.”

I can’t count how many times I have been on the receiving end of such treatment.

In stark contrast, Jesus showed compassion. “…Jesus was a redeemer who took initiative to reach out to the lost and pull them up into life…” .

Oh thank you, thank you, thank you, Sally, for sharing this valuable advice and to Sarah Mae who was brave to write about her struggles as a mama.

Many who aren’t even mamas should read this book.

As you can tell from the photo, there are so many quotes, lessons learned, and practical ideas I found. I have marked many of them so I can refer back to them in the future.

You can get your own copy here.

Keep hiking forward,

Sharon 🙂

*I have not been financially compensated for this review. I was sent a free copy. All my opinions here are my very own. There are no affiliate links.

Tuesdays Unwrapped: Just. Follow. Me.

12.11.12

For the month of December, on Tuesdays, Emily has invited us to unwrap our gifts with her at Chatting At the Sky. Join in if you would like. You can find the how, what, and when, here.

The comparison game continued… Part 1 can be found here and Part 2 can be found here.

Another gift unwrapped… (the first can be found here)

The Holy Spirit spoke so clearly about another area where the comparison game was played in my mind.

I kept stumbling at having been up against a double standard in my past that changed my life – turned my world upside down.

I know that it was for my good. It was necessary to be broken free of that bondage so I could walk in liberty. That same liberty Paul tells us to ‘stand fast’ in when he wrote Galatians 5:1.

Being told, “you can’t —” even though others are — (very publicly), caused me to doubt myself. How was it okay for them but not for me?

I struggled with this and was stuck in this quagmire too long.

I saw it from the negative vantage point of “God has shown ‘favor’ to them because they are allowed to — with no repercussions therefore God must hate me.” Oh, how well this fit into Beth’s illustration.

This is a comparison issue at it’s root and THIS IS ALSO FALSE.

God doesn’t hate me!!

Not only was I seeing it from the wrong viewpoint but it caused me to plod down that spiral of depression, stripping from me self-worth and self-esteem. It made me de-value myself.

I do have value.

Galatians tells me I am a child of God.

“For ye are all the children of God by faith in Christ Jesus.” Galatians 3:26

Wooohooo! Hallelujah! I need that reminder. I am so forgetful of God’s promises to me.

We need not ever ask, “but what about them?”

In John 21 we read a conversation between Peter and Jesus in reference to John. Peter asks Jesus, “Lord, and what shall this man do?” Peter was playing the comparison game wasn’t he? He was comparing his future ministry with that of John’s. He was comparing God’s will for John and God’s will for him.